Scandal Rocks Suburban Jr. High School – Who Wears Short-Shorts?


For weeks this has been the hot topic of conversation in my “mini-v” as I pick-up my young riders after school. It seems the school is on a mission to make an example of the girlies who choose to wear their too-short-shorts to school. Y’all know I detest a bootie short, but a small part of me feels bad for these kids – here’s why:


1)   Shorts deemed too short? These girls are forced to change into their gym uniform shorts for the remainder of the day. Now I’m sure THIS doesn’t draw too much attention to them at all.

2)   No gym shorts? Well then the school will call a parent to come and bring them something within the school’s guidelines. That’s not something that would really piss off a hard working parent, now would it? Naw, especially one working in the city. Nothing like a 2-hour afternoon drive back in to the burbs to bring a different pair of shorts to your lovely daughter.

3)   My son is upset and wants to openly protest this rule. He says that these shorts are his favorite. He also says, “Mom, I’m a teenage boy. What else do you expect me to say?” Disturbing? Yes.  Cute and passionate? YES.

4)   Have you been out shopping lately? Unless your daughter can still squeeze her ass into something from The Children’s Place, she’s out of luck. It’s a short-short and skinny jean world in each and every Junior’s Department everywhere. These teens are left with little choice. 

5)   As a result of this rule, many give up on shorts and resort to only wearing their skinny jeans which means many are pushing the seasonal boundaries by pairing their skinnies with the dreaded UGG BOOT (this is quite possibly the worst consequence.)

 Administrative staff and faculty, let’s cut these girls a break. If the “cheeks” aren’t peekin’ then the girls aren’t streakin’ (I decided this is what my picket sign would say.) Where will it end? I personally find a muffin-top that spilleth over to be waaaay more distracting and a girl donning the very suggestive color “PINK” on her rear end to be more disturbing.

Times they are a changing. So unless the school is adopting a uniform policy they have to lighten-up a bit on the length or crack down ALL inappropriate attire. (Stepping down from my soap-box for now . . .and there is most definitely a Beyonce song playing in the background as the teenage girls begin to cheer loudly . . .)

I dedicate this post to my mom, RAB – who marched into the principal’s office on the day I wore shorts (long shorts) “too early” in the season and got sent to the principal’s office. She read Mr. Heller the riot act and it was AWESOME. I’m sure he was just too fat and didn’t want anyone to wear shorts if he couldn’t, but still . . . Thanks Mom. I’ll never forget how you stood up for my freedom of fashion choice. It’s the little things. Happy Mother’s Day! xo


4 Responses to “Scandal Rocks Suburban Jr. High School – Who Wears Short-Shorts?”

  1. Maria May 10, 2013 at 1:46 pm #

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    Oh I’m sure my son would agree with yours. Love this! It is definitely hard when all that is sold is short.

  2. LovesGray May 10, 2013 at 3:40 pm #

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    Completely agree! Recently took my soon to be 13 year old daughter to the mall only to be met with looks of disdain when I asked the 17 year sales girl is AE sold shorts longer than 1 inch! But guess what- THEY DO! You just have to ask… they are tucked away in the back and are full price. Not bad, considering the extra fabric they have!

  3. Leanne May 10, 2013 at 4:11 pm #

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    I think tou are taking issue with the wrong people. If we ask for (demand other options by not buying the short-shorts) it might change. Schools should stick to their policies. And they should enforce it across the board. BTW, Mr. Heller – nice call back.

  4. Mackenzie May 10, 2013 at 5:47 pm #

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    I think you are my hero now! I don’t own any shorts because everything is so short that they “aren’t appropriate” for school and therefore my mother won’t buy them. I mean, I understand that some shorts are WAY too skimpy, but if they’re as short as soccer and/or athletic shorts (which are pretty short but not too short) then we should be able to wear them!

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