Attention Progressive, Geico & Allstate: My Closet Runneth Over

SJP takes it allllll in.

I think I might be over-insured. Yes, there is such a thing. See, you should probably have ample health, life and home insurance but you should also be sure that you have enough hanging in your closet to “cover you” when something unexpected occurs. Call me paranoid, but I’ve got it all covered, and then some. AND. IT. IS. AWESOME.

 

These are all lies: You can never be too rich, too thin or over-insured. I’ve spent the last several years perfecting my wardrobe. Constantly on the hunt for staples and classics and the perfect clothing items that scream, “IT’S SO ME, I SHALL WEAR IT FOREVER!”

Perfect black boots? CHECK. I’ve got em’ in every material and height.

Jeans? They say the average person owns 7 pair. I say the average person owns 7 pair of crops, 7 pair of flares, 7 pair of skinnies and 7 pair of distressed denim in various styles. I know I do.

Dresses? You name the length and the occasion and I have it covered. Solids, prints, maxis, etc.

“Oh you braggy bitch,” you’re saying. “Woah is me!” (I hear you.) “#WhiteGirlProblems – you’re tweeting. Go ahead and grab those two-shits I could give you, because in my world this means never having to say, “I have nothing to wear.”

My name is Kelly Boston and I’m over-insured. This is not the result of spending countless days wandering Nordstrom and Bloomies or of being a bored housewife spending all of hubby’s hard earned cash at the mall. It’s the result of taking the time to edit my closet and find the things that work for me. I shop everywhere. Sometimes paying retail, sometimes hitting sales and occasionally finding a resale gem. It’s the labor of building a wardrobe where every item has several partners and I never have to swap-out from season to season, because it all lives happily together. Right now, there is no better place for me to shop than my own closet.

Perhaps I’m growing up. Perhaps I’m growing wise. Perhaps a new trend will come along soon that speaks to my personal style and it will find a happy home in my wardrobe. Until then, I’ll stare happily at the items hanging at my disposal, knowing that I’m comfortably covered; a feeling that I wish upon you all. If you build it, you too WILL be happy…and hopefully over-insured in the best possible way.

Have you left yourself uninsured in the event of a fashion catastrophe? Or rather, are you happily covered and ready to “dress” no matter what life throws at you? Well Flo, the little green gecko, the black guy with the REALLY deep voice and I are all very proud of you. Do tell…

 

 

 

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